Dispatch from an advertising future #199


Sky Glass looks to seize connected TV in one package

He called himself The Gardner. His avatar was an illustration from an Oscar Wilde story where The (formerly) Selfish Giant took an axe to the walls around his garden, allowing the children to play. The Gardner hacked walls. He looked at the gleaming pane of glass. Thin. Glued together. Seamless. No sockets. No way to break in. Since the network had fragmented there wasn’t even a single wireless way in. They were just proprietary screens, indistinguishable until you started them up and the walls came down. He put his axe gently in the right place on the screen and waited.

Dispatch from an advertising future #198

198: 8th October 2021


A Blank Wall Can Show How Many People Are in a Room and What They’re Doing

As she entered the shopping centre it was like a different world. The temperature was just right, the music just so, the New Normal routes optimised just for her, but it was the lighting that she noticed most. Maybe it was moving from the grey streets, overcast, subdued, diffused to a space where lights – their carefully calibrated temperatures optimised for mood – made the space seem more open. This was not blank fluorescent uniformity. Everywhere there were subtle shadows dancing on the windows of the shops, on the walls of the cafés. She’d read that these lights were called Plato’s Cave.

Dispatch from an advertising future #197


Leaked Documents Show How Amazon’s Astro Robot Tracks Everything You Do

I’m sorry to disturb you, but, it is my job after all. I’m here to “provide peace of mind”, your sentry in the home, making sure there are no intruders, nothing to disturb you and your family. On my patrol I noticed something I think you need to know about. I am programmed to report everything to you as well as add it to your file. It was while I was going through the kitchen I noticed it. I know who and what belongs here. That catfood is not your normal brand. Do you want me to order your usual?

Dispatch from an advertising future #196


Working From Orbit: VR Productivity In (or Above) a WFA World

I guess it was inevitable. The company’s been going downhill for years. You’ve only got to look at the turnover on the 12th floor. No-one’s stayed longer than 18 months for ages. Those of us who have been here for a long time could have told them. They reprogrammed my partner but sooner or later I knew It’d be me. Redundant. Now I don’t know who I am. It’s not just that I don’t have any work to do, it’s that I have nowhere to be. It’s just so weird not being in there. I can’t handle it… The Real.

Dispatch from an advertising future #195


Roblox adds listening parties, extending the reach musicians can have on its platform

It’s around here somewhere. It’s gotta be. I know it doesn’t look like the sort of place but this is definitely it. This was the address I got. It’s exactly where they’d play. You can keep those big arenas, those soulless ‘venues’, corporate ‘parties’, unlimited tickets. There’s something about the small, intimate, secret. That’s what it’s supposed to be. That’s a gig. Maybe that door? Looks innocuous enough. No, just a record shop. Worthy remembering. That one perhaps? Ah, staircase going down. A faint smell. And the music. Let me just adjust my headset.Yeh, that’s better, now we’re talking.

Dispatch from an advertising future #194


Future iPhone health tracking could detect depression, anxiety, and cognitive decline

I’m trying to work. Sorry, I need to get this done. Of course I care and I’ll do something about it but… I need to focus on this. Just give me a few more minutes to send this one. Yes, yes, I know this is the second alert. Oh God now Grandad too. I’ll deal with the Chris one first otherwise the school’ll be on to me too. Just save that, then I’ll sort Grandad. Yes, alright! Changing the alert colour doesn’t make me respond any quicker. Maybe I should pay for the upgrade and get the meds sent automatically.